Sorry for the Group Email

We’re in Sydney, of which more later, but in the meantime:

You’re a varied bunch, aren’t you? I assumed that most people would visit this site because, um, I told them to. On my last day at work I emailed approximately everyone I’d ever met, giving them the URL of SFTGE and the wrong email address for the new guy.

Instead, people have arrived at SFTGE from everywhere. Some have clicked through from friend’s blogs, others have arrived from emails sent to friends, but the majority of readers arrive from Google.

Here, apropos of absolutely nothing except a vague urge to do some more writing, are some of the things you’re looking for.

1. “travel ho chi minh city to ‘mui ne’”

Possible by train or by bus. We did in reverse, mind, from Mui Ne to Saigon.

2. “squat toilet”

They’re not pleasant but you’ll have to deal with them at some point. Find out how here.

3. “chinese embassy london queue”

Yes, there is one. I suggest taking a book.

4. “distance from hong kong to xian”

886 miles, if the Google Maps Distance Calculator is correct. You can probably fly, we took the train. Of course, you have to change in Guangzhou. Nothing’s ever easy.

5. “monkey email.com”

I’m not sure they can, but I’d pay to see you try.

6. “siem reap to ban lung”

Again, we did this Cambodian trip in reverse. It’s easy to arrange. It just takes an exceptionally long time.

7. “dog sled protesting websites”

This one just made me feel bad.

8. “how painful are vaccinations”

This, and its derivatives, popped up a lot. The answer is that it really depends on the person doing the vaccinating. A more holistic answer is “not much”. Not much compared to, say, meningitis or polio.

9. “mongolia character set visa”

The Mongolians don’t make applying for a tourist visa easy, what with their downloadable application form (in .doc format) only working if you have the Mongolian character set installed on your PC. I’m going to bet you don’t. So don’t use the Mongolian website - head here and get the PDF version. They didn’t mind when I used it.

10. “arm hurt after vaccinations”

Yes. Obviously.

11. “do you need travel vaccinations to go to england?”

No. Seriously?

12. “does the yellow fever injection hurt?”

I love that you’ve been specific, but no. All injections hurt about as much as each other, unless it’s one of those ones with the massive needle injected straight into your abdomen. We didn’t have any of those.

13. “free travel vaccinations”

There were a lot of these. The answer, as far as I can ascertain, is no. Certainly not in England.

14. “guangzhou mugging blog”

I wasn’t sure if this meant the blog of a Guangzhou mugger, or the blog of someone who gets habitually mugged in Guangzhou. Or if it was something else completely. If anyone finds it, let me know.

15. “how to say masturbate in vietnamese”

Good God. I’m thrilled to say that this information can’t be found on SFTGE.

16. “i’ve killed 4 cockroaches… is that a lot?”

Depends where you are. In Asia, no.

17. “is lake baikal half fresh and half salt water?”

No. How would that even work?

18. “leech bite first aid”

There’s nothing you can do, except whimper quietly, mop up the blood and get on with it.

19. “thai ladyboys”

Yes, we saw some. They were neither subtle, nor plausible as women.

Dave would like to apologise to Matt for stealing his idea.